The Problem of People Pleasing

People pleasing often manifests as difficulty in saying no and asserting personal needs, leading to an increased workload and responsibility. This tendency is especially prevalent among working mothers, who balance professional obligations with the demands of managing a household. The habit can be difficult to break, but learning to assert boundaries is essential.

To overcome people pleasing, it is important to recognise that time and resources are limited. Prioritising personal well-being and setting realistic expectations are crucial to preventing burnout. Assertiveness is not aggression; it is the ability to communicate needs clearly and manage responsibilities effectively.

Breaking the cycle begins with identifying immediate needs and communicating them. Whether it is delegating household tasks or negotiating work deadlines, assertiveness enables individuals to maintain balance and protect their mental health.

Here are some tips to break the habit of people pleasing:

Set Clear Priorities: Identify your most important commitments and focus your energy accordingly.
Practice Saying No: Politely decline requests that exceed your capacity or do not align with your priorities.
Use Assertive Communication: Express your needs and limits clearly, without apology or justification.
Delegate When Possible: Share responsibilities at work and home to avoid becoming overwhelmed.
Schedule Personal Time: Block out time for self-care and activities that recharge you.
Reflect on Your Motivations: Notice when you agree to requests out of guilt or fear, and challenge these patterns.
Seek Support: Consider coaching or counselling to build assertiveness skills and reinforce healthy boundaries.

Implementing these steps can help you maintain balance, protect your mental health, and manage responsibilities more effectively. Once you break the habit of people pleasing, you will feel free from the burden of a too heavy load, you will also worry less about what others think of you.

If you struggle with people pleasing, Sidelines can help you become more assertive in your communication without feeling guilty of setting clear boundaries. Email us to speak with a coach.